This map, made by tracking the songs listened to by music service users who have zip codes attached to their accounts, shows each state’s most distinctively well-liked artist.
Y’all are really uptight.
For real. Just drop it. I don’t like the fact that gay is even a word that describes sexuality.
Really. Are gay and straight actual things? Or are they just proclivities for one gender over another?
I’malright with using gay as a generic pejorative term. I’m against it as a description of sexuality.
Eat a dick bitch. It’s called contemporary English. Deal with it.
Friendly reminder that “panini” is actually plural. What we have here in the picture is one panino. If you say “paninis” I will cry.
Friendly reminder that English and Italian are not the same language, and loanwords don’t really care about things like “rules”.
I like to call them panins (rhymes with machines) just to annoy everyone. Language is style; it thrives on manipulation.
Saying “Can I have a panino please?” in English would probably get you some slightly weird looks. Even though the word comes from Italian, the English VERSION of the word has been altered from panino/panini to panini/paninis.
yeah we steal your words. it doesn’t even matter who ‘you’ are. and then we turn them into bastardized english-hybrid love children. sue us.
See: sans, haiku, foyer, et cetera, Cicero, toke, octopus, cactus, Spanish present tense verbs vs. those of Latin, jaqueta (spanish), good, Jesus, the inside of your oven when it’s on, fish, Japanese anime, etc.
See also: American English
Watch/listen: David Sedaris - Nicaraguan French
Felix didn’t know what else to do. He called Joe.
—Nothing. Feeling kind of anxious
—Want to come by?
—I’d like that.
Felix got on his bike and took the Cherry Creek Trail into town. He took a right onto 14th, but decided to take the sidewalk as it seemed superior to avoiding the traffic stopped in the street. Felix and Joe sat over steaming coffee cups in Joe’s large loft.
—We should make a sitcom. Joe suggested.
—What is this?
—Us sitting around drinking coffee and talking about things. That would make a good show.
—Oh yeah! That’s a good idea. We should have an episode about two people sitting around drinking coffee talking about creating a show about people sitting around drinking coffee and talking.
—Okay, I like where you are going. Go on.
—And one character could be like ‘hey, let’s make an episode about two people sitting around drinking coffee talking about creating a show about people sitting around drinking coffee and talking.’
—I hate you.
—Hold on, there’s more. And then they create a show in our show. And then a character on their show could be like ‘Hey, let’s make a show about two people sitting around talking about trivial things over coffee,’ and then his friend says ‘yeah! and we can have an episode in which the main characters decide to make a show about themselves drinking coffee,’ just like we did, ‘and one of the characters can be like “hey let’s have an episode where the characters decide to make a sitcom based on their time spent drinking coffee and talking about things and we’ll call it Seinfeld. “‘
—I have never wanted to stab you to death more than I do right now.
—Awe, Felix said and squeed a little. (It was indeed as disturbing as it sounds.)
—On the real though, Felix began, something’s been on my mind.
Felix expressed to Joe how the case had been driving Felix insane. He didn’t want anyone to know, not the reader, not the author, and especially not Marcus. He didn’t even want Joe to know, though he never stated this particular fact directly.
—I’m so sick of seeing Marcus. The thought of seeing him again before I crack this case causes me physical pain. Literally and Figuratively. I saw him at the café you know.
—I know. You’ve told me like thirty times already.
—Yeah, yeah. There’s no need to be a douche about it.
And Felix went on.
—Jesus, man. It’s not easy being like this. I manage it okay, at least outwardly. I do manage it okay, don’t I? Regardless. I think all the time. All of the time. I never stop thinking about this biz. That’s what makes me good at it. But ability comes at a price. A blessing is only a blessing as long as it’s not a curse. Ya know? So I do the dance. I do what it takes. My measly balancing act and I. And the chemicals. Oh, the chemicals. But, it’s not like I’m unaware of my unorthodox substance use.
—Unorthodox substance use?
—Don’t pass your judgement on me right now, man. You know it’s difficult enough for me to open up about myself without your vile ad hominem defensiveness.
—Just go on.
—What was I saying? I don’t know, I just want to beat my head against the wall right now. It bothers the shit out of me that I’ve been unable to solve this case. I mean, how hard is it to find a fucking key? Do you know how many times I’ve thought about just smashing the box open? Breaking it to pieces and setting the apartment on fire. Going to Marcus’ place, poisoning him, and setting you up to take the fall.
Joe looked mortified. Felix flashed his signature smile for the first time since arriving at Joe’s.
Joe, being the good friend he was, both comforted and berated Felix in such a way that Felix felt better, but still somewhat unsure of himself. They brewed more coffee, smoked a few bowls, and eventually turned to electronic forms of diversion. Joe at his computer and Felix on a nearby couch playing a game on Joe’s large tv. The game was bright and colorful. The goal of the game was to roll up everything you find into a ball. The jumbled ball grew larger and larger as Felix rolled and rolled, eventually eating up everything in the stage.
Excerpt from Bloom by This Guy
Pictures from Chris Sharp’s Untitled 365 Project (http://year-of-the-creep.tumblr.com/)
Bloom is the story of:
Felix, a young self-proclaimed detective.
His best friend Joe the shape shifting dog.
And mysterious woman Miranda, whose probably a witch.
Watch hilarity and drama unfold as things happen and events occur! You’ll be enthralled by it’s primate-oriented archetypes and unrelenting truthiness. So sit down, pack a bowl and a bag of chips and come along for the ride into Bloom, your portal into 21st-century life in America.